‘Alesha’
I had a dream the other night, one of those vivid ones that’s essence has stayed with me today. In the dream, I was centre stage in a play and I was everything. I could sing, I could dance and I felt free. I had applause and attention and a feeling of specialness and dazzlingness that made me feel wonderful. And at the end of the play, a wise woman appeared and we chatted. Her name was Alesha Florrick and she’s a character from a TV show I used to watch. The show was ‘The Good Wife’, and ah! I loved that show and how I loved Alesha! With her killer heels, and her hot to trot dress,with her great lines and her hot shot lawyer ways. She was the housewife transformed, having a second career in her 40’s and she was having a blast. I love the strength of her character and her vulnerability. I loved her messy life, and her even messier marriage. She was the warrior woman that I was yearning to be, and I loved seeing her change roles, from mother, wife, homecarer and super clever lawyer who got the job done. I still love that character and I love everything about the undoingness of her past that made her a strong badass woman.
I think about the symbols of femininity that I have identified with over the years. The ‘Cinderella’ from my youth, yearning for the prince to come and take me away and shower me with flowers and heady love poems. Then I was ‘Maid Marion’ from the 80’s show Robin of Sherwood, and Michael Praed and then Jason Connery became my heros, who would swing into my bedroom with their bow and arrow. And whisk me off to the forest where we would live happily ever after. Oh my! I have just remembered the full size picture of ‘Robin’ on my bedroom ceiling and me writing Robin of Sherwood all over my school books, in my best calligraphy writing. And when Robin died, I watched the arrow flames falling into the river, with tears rolling down my cheeks.
I am a romantic! There I have said it. And yet my feminine role models have changed shaped over the years. Alesha is the ‘Warrior Woman’ and I love her. I can identify with the strength she has, and yet she still oozes femininity and beauty and just all round sensuality. I love that I can be strong and vulnerable, sensual and sensitive. And I embrace all those qualities in me now. I love lace and flowers and everything girly, and I am also a Warrior Woman, all at the same time!